A New Year's Parade in Toledo

Thousands of fans from Northwest Ohio and Southeast Michigan lined the streets of Toledo to celebrate the first world championship team in Glass City history, the 2009 Toledo Neanderthal.

As the bands played, local politicians marched and the team, players and executives, rode through the streets of downtown beginning at Fifth Third field and ending at the Glass Bowl where the loyal season ticket holders got to watch and participate in the glorious celebration.

Team owner and native Toledoan, Gene Bell, rode in the lead vehicle accompanied by General Manager, Tonda, both of whom had been snubbed in voting for executive of the year. "Getting Maurice was a key to our late season success." Bell reminded the crowd. " And you must remember that the trade was made four weeks before Ronnie's season ending injury. Now, that is leadership".

Bell also asked the crowd to honor the efforts of Coach Marty, who many thought could never win the big one, but proved his detractors wrong in only his second season of BFL exposure. "It is an honor to have followed Coach Sam, who really laid the ground work for this success. I know that he received the McKay trophy earlier in his career and I will strive for similar honors in the future." remarked the coach who was also snubbed for consideration inspite of leading the cavemen to the best regular season record this year.

Also on the podium at the celebration, QB Phillip Rivers, a candidate for the Selmon trophy but also over looked for the award, reminded the crowd that the success of the team in winning the Culverhouse Trophy was not an individual effort. "Everyone contributed in their own way. Each week someone stepped up and you see the results. I can't help it if no one, individually, strikes fear in their opponents hearts every week, like Drew and Peyton. But we succeeded where they did not."

Results of the voting for the Williams trophy, for some reason, haven't been announced yet, but if the crowd reaction on Friday was any indication, there will be much disgruntlement in Toledo if Rivers does not win the award.

The final speaker at the rally appeared via the Subway Fresh Take Hotline from his prison cell, as Plaxico exhorted the crowd to relish in another first in league history. The Neanderthal completed the first "hat trick", posting the best regular season record, winning the scrubs game against the Wollfs and finally capping the season with the BFL World Championship.

We look forward to another great year in 2010

Win, lose, or draw

Bucco Bruce Bowl XIII

98 Toledo Neanderthal Pts Phillip Rivers 36 Frank Gore 19 Maurice Jones-Drew 11 Vincent Jackson 9 Andre Johnson 15 Greg Jennings 11 Fred Davis 3 Mason Crosby 10 Vikings 7

80 Springfield Atoms Pts Aaron Rodgers 17 Ryan Grant 23 Rashard Mendenhall 6 Hines Ward 6 Brandon Marshall 10 Miles Austin 15 Tony Gonzalez 3 Ryan Longwell 7 Bengals 16

Springfield Atoms Bucco Bruce Bowl Starting Lineup

Atoms Make Second-Ever Trip to Bucco Bruce Bowl Coach Flanders Colored "Tickled Pink" Tampa, FL -- Cinderella has made it to the dance. After an 0-5 start, things looked pretty dismal for the Springfield Atoms. Four straight losses to start the season resulted in a change of leadership at the head coaching position when Springfield General Manager, Rob Hart, fired former coach Barry Alvarez and hired Ned Flanders. Though Flanders dropped his first game to Moose River, the team has gone on an unprecedented roll, defeating every team they faced...except one. The Toledo Neanderthal. To say Cinderella's dance card is full is not an understatement. It was week 10 of the BFL season when the Neanderthal and the Atoms last met. In that game, Springfield was unable to shut down Toledo's potent run attack and Frank Gore and Maurice Jones Drew had huge games. The Atoms struggled to get a passing game going, and in the end collapsed under the weight of the Viking defense. So, what's the difference between last game and this one? How about 5 straight wins and one of the best wide receiver corps in the league? A stronger defense that's playing hungry. A Quarterback who was great the last time they played, but in between then and now was named BFL MVP. And a coach, whose genius and cult (though he would disagree with that choice of word) of personality has led him to a 9-2 record as a head coach and who was named BFL Coach of the Year. Are the Atoms they same team they were in Week 10? Maybe on the outside. On the inside, they're completely different. They're confident, focused, and playing and praying at a much higher level. In 2006 the Atoms made their first trip to the Bucco Bruce Bowl, eschewing years of a negative perception of a mediocre franchise that bounced around from city to city and owner to owner. Springfield won that game, and in the years since have been to the playoffs every season. This return trip to the Big Sombrero is a chance to prove to the fans and to the rest of the BFL that the Atoms are here to stay. And they're here to win. Starting Lineup: QB-Aaron Rodgers RB-Ryan Grant RB-Rashard Mendenhall WR-Hines Ward (DNS Pierre Garcon) WR-Brandon Marshall WR-Miles Austin TE-Tony Gonzalez K-Ryan Longwell D-Bengals

Bucco Bruce Bound

To look at the scores of last week's division finals a casual observer might think that the two highest scoring teams were meeting in the Championship game. But the casual observer might be wrong. In fact Toledo and Springfield each had to beat the highest scoring team in their respective divisions to advance to this weeks contest.

"The Neanderthal have always taken pride in their defensive prowess and this year is no exception," proclaimed general manager, Tonda. "We have great confidence that the Vikings can control the Atoms potency. I know for a fact the our owner has had a fascination for Vikings ever since he took an aptitude test during his junior year at Roy C. Start High School when the results of the test recommended a career as either a shepherd or a viking."

When asked to comment the judge recalled that schoolmates Bob Beers and Ron Tuohy made plans to construct long ships, sail east from Toledo, set strategically placed charges around the city of Cleveland, and then tow it out into the middle of Lake Erie and sink it. "But like so many other plans of our youth this dream never came true."

Other dreams have come true however and those include a first ever trip to the Championship Game for the BFL. An original franchise that has always found itself in the middle of the pack, this year rose above the rest and secured the best regular season record. All well and good, but the loyal citizens of the Glass capital of the world deserve the ultimate award in professional sports.

That is why we brought in Coach Marty, to dispel the notion that he can do well in the regular season but flops in the playoffs. "The team has the ultimate respect for the man and what he can do. Now we must perform. And I love to get a chance to play, and sing it." said long time Caveman, Frank Gore.

In an unusual move team owner, Gene Bell, has indicated that, believing that defense will be key to this week's game, the Neanderthal will concede the coin flip to the Atoms, choosing to go on defense to start the game. "And if they refuse, we will just have to start early with the Rivers to Jackson combination that has been so successful this year.

Coach Marty has decided to go with most of the same lineup that has brought the team this deep into the season. "This lineup is just about the happiest sound goin' down today."

QB RIVERS
RB GORE AND JONES-DREW
REC V. JACKSON. A. JOHNSON, & JENNINGS
TE F. DAVIS
K CROSBY
DEF VIKINGS

Playoff Results: Week Two

89 Sin City Grifters Pts Drew Brees 22 DeAngelo Williams 2 Ray Rice 14 Chad Ochocinco 15 Larry Fitzgerald 12 Sidney Rice 5 Antonio Gates 12 Nate Kaeding 11 Saints 6

141 Toledo Neanderthal Pts Phillip Rivers 38 Frank Gore 14 Maurice Jones-Drew 24 Greg Jennings 20 Andre Johnson 22 Vincent Jackson 25 Kevin Boss 0 Mason Crosby 4 Vikings 4

124 Springfield Atoms Pts Aaron Rodgers 53 Ryan Grant 9 Rashard Mendenhall 19 Pierre Garcon 3 Miles Austin 23 Brandon Marshall 17 Tony Gonzalez 11 Ryan Longwell 1 Colts 13

81 West Virginia Woolfs Pts Matt Schaub 31 Chris Johnson 12 Thomas Jones 5 Marques Colston 10 Calvin Johnson 5 DeSean Jackson 21 Vernon Davis 5 Matt Stover 5 Packers 12

Springfield Atoms WIlliams Division Chamionship - Full Lineup

Nucleus of Atoms is Ned Flanders Rodgers, Austin, Marshall build case for being ions Charleston, WV -- In Week 1 of the BFL Playoffs, the Springfield Atoms continued their winning ways under new Head Coach Ned Flanders by easily dispatching of the Moose River Mounties. Despite the sub-par performance turned in by Aaron Rodgers, Wide Receiver Brandon Marshall had a BFL record setting game, due in large part to plays drawn up by Flanders that involved Marshall being thrown to by every member of the offensive line. The road to the Bucco Bruce Bowl, however, goes through Charleston, West Virginia, where the Atoms will face a team they beat by only 1 point the last time the Ned Flanders-led squad faced them. "The Woolfs have a great team this year," said General Manager Rob Hart, "Chris Johnson, Vernon Davis, and DeSean Jackson, will give our defense a lot to worry about out there on Sunday. But, I think we're up to the task as long as we continue to take this journey one game at a time." Coach Flanders agreed. "Our focus is on winning this diddily game, not who we'd play in the doodly Bucco Bruce Bowl." Rumors that Flanders has some tricks up his sleeve for this game are flying around the Atoms locker room. "I saw Reverend Lovejoy blessing the Gatorade!" exclaimed an excited Ryan Grant, "Now not only will we be replacing electrolytes, but we'll be cleansing our souls too!" Only time will tell if the Springfield Atoms will be taking their second ever trip to the Bucco Bruce Bowl, but if anyone get get this team to believe it's Ned Flanders. Starting Lineup: QB-Aaron Rodgers RB-Ryan Grant RB-Rashard Mendenhall WR-Pierre Garcon (already played) WR-Brandon Marshall WR-Miles Austin (already played) TE-Tony Gonzalez K-Ryan Longwell D-Colts (already played)

Gifts for the Cavemen

Just as the Magi came bearing gifts thousands of years ago, the Neanderthal have received several gifts recently from the other teams in the McKay Division as tribute for winning the division this year for the first time in franchise history.

Robert Baker of the Bears sent a recording of the caliope playing "Favorites of the Big Top". Chris Holly of the Fifes sent a replica of the gavel used by the Mayberry Justice of the Peace. Brian Birch of the Woodchucks sent a bell which formerly rang in the Agora of Athens.

"We are waiting to see what gift the Grifters bring when they arrive for this weekends showdown" mused team owner, Gene Bell, anticipating whether his son and owner of the Sin City franchise would follow suit or whether he would try to leave town not only with the championship but with the gifts as well.

This year our team has honored the memory of Mary Travers and this week is no different. We thank the other teams in our division for the hammer of justice, the bell of freedom and the song about the love between our brother and sisters all over this land.

NO CHANGES TO THE LINEUP PREVIOUSLY POSTED

Grifters' Dedicate Inevitable Win To Henry Possible Benchwarmer's Death Raises Questions of Rosters Past LAS VEGAS--Upon hearing the news of Mayberry receiver Chris Henry's untimely death at the hands of the back of a pick up truck, the Sin City Grifters dedicated their upcoming game against Toledo to the player, who is believed to have been a Grifter in the past. "I remember him in the locker room a year or two ago," said running backs coach Deuce McAllister, who would have been one of Henry's teammates if he was actually on the team. "I'm not sure if he was on the roster or if he was just hanging out talking to some friends before the game." "Regardless of whether he was on the team or not, we need to take a moment and reflect on just how important this man was and join the country--maybe the entire world--in a moment of contemplative thanks for all he's done for the animated film industry," said owner Jake Bell. Reporters then corrected Bell by noting that the dead guy in question was Chris Henry and not Walt Disney. Bell was further informed that it was actually Roy Disney who died recently, not Walt. Drew Brees DeAngelo Williams Ray Rice Chad Ochocinco Larry Fitzgerald Sidney Rice Antonio Gates Nate Kaeding Saints

Springfield Atoms Williams Division Championship - Early Starters

Taking the field early for the Atoms will be:

WR: Pierre Garcon
WR: Miles Austin
D: Colts